Tuesday, October 13, 2020

Roland-Garros 2020: “An Autumnal Diversion”?

Um… okay? The title sounds like a terrible James Bond sequel but if the folks at RG wanna roll with it, that’s cool. It’s just one of the eye-catching headlines I’ve seen recently…


When it comes to international journalism, the occasional translation error always keeps things spicy (and violent):


This year really felt different, unsurprisingly. The memo must have said “BYO booze, energy and motivation because you’re not gonna get it from here!”

You know you’re at notorious RG when you have to play in the rain:

“What’s this in the air? Oh yeah, my swagger”















I don’t know what I’m more worried about; the fact that Azarenka lost to the world no. 181 or her odd behaviour:

"Bonjour, everybody!"


...

My COVID mind's on overdrive

“She cray!”




















































I should be concerned. After all, RG’s infection control didn’t look too hot, at least on the first day. A player or two left a towel in the on-court baskets. The grubs! 
 
I wasn’t sure if I was watching tennis or was at Ringwood Station given that the ballkids were dressed like eshays. For this reason and others:

Anett Kontaveit must have woken up after she got dressed, with her bra on top:
















Kiki looked like a tradie:

#dutchorange
















Others were more conservative (but still shady):

“Ima go and rob a bank now”













                                                                                

Ash Barty wasn’t here to defend her title but she clearly had her priorities in order:

Can someone please explain the weird-ass sound installation/noir/arthouse stuff going on at the change of ends? It sounds like horror movie stock-footage followed by an orgasm. 

Just in: I’ve come to understand that it's the Perrier advertisement. That makes it okay, then?!

At least you can never call Roland-Garros tacky. Well, I guess the racquet grips are…
















Mise en scène aside, I did actually watch some tennis!

Iga! No, I’m not talking about the Aussie supermarkets. Truth be told, I didn’t expect you to win from the start, but stranger things have happened this year. From one heavy music fan to another, rock on! 
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